What's wrong with me?

I have known that I have celiac disease for about five years now. The road hasn't been easy. It is quite cumbersome trying to navigate what it means to be celiac and everything that entails. For me, I have what is known as cross reactors. This means there are other things that affect my body in the same way as gluten does. When I first found out, I immediately dove into all the research I could possibly find. To be honest, there wasn't a lot. I have found most of my information from others who also have Celiac disease rather than doctors. In fact, I went to a nutritionist early on and told them these other things affect me and they were very dismissive. It took years of me fine honing every aspect of life to try to manage this. There have been a few times when I have slipped up and thought, "Oh, it doesn't really affect me that much" and then there was an entire year that I thought, "I'm better. I can eat what I would like." Boy was I wrong. The detrimental lasting affects that had on my body was severe. I was sick all the time. Then, I finally got it together and have been gluten free ever since. Do you know what happened at the beginning of this year in spite of me following a very strict gluten free diet? I became very sick. I honestly don't remember a good portion of the beginning of this year. For months I thought I had dementia. My attitude was changed. I couldn't get out of bed. I couldn't take care of my family in the way I enjoy. I really thought I was dying. I have been to so many doctors and finally received some answers after months of pain and wearisome symptoms. Kidney stones in both kidneys that were too large to pass on my own, degenerative disc disease, cysts on my one remaining ovary, umbilical hernia (thankfully this is too small to need surgery), insulin resistance causing my pancreas to work too hard and anything in my body that could be inflamed was absolutely inflamed. My body can't process folic acid well because of the MTHFR gene and doesn't create glucose for energy in the way that it needs. I found out that I am also allergic to eggs and casein and had too much candida in my gut. My B-vitamins were essentially non-existent and I had extremely low Vitamin D and Omegas. I had arsenic poisoning. What? How?? On top of all of this, I was taking a medication for depression and a medication for what I thought was a urinary tract infection (this pain was actually the kidney stones). What I found out is pretty significant and something that I will absolutely attribute to the stepping stone of this very odd year. My body has a significant gene-drug interaction with those two medications. I have a significant gene-drug interaction to the depression medicine I was taking and the medicine for the infection. It is no wonder I thought I had dementia and would literally wake up every day wondering what was wrong with me. I don't remember much, but I do remember crying in the shower so many times. I do remember looking at my kids and just being so grateful for the time I have had with them on this earth. I remember looking at their beautiful faces and thinking about how they are such amazing humans and then crying because I just wanted to remember them forever. I wanted more time with them. I wanted them to have a mom well into their adult lives. I wanted to see them grow and flourish in this life. I was in such a bad state because of all the poisons coursing through my body that it just made me a different person. A different person with a hopeless outlook. I wondered what was wrong with me? I was very sick for months. How many times have I taken that exact same depression medicine in the past and it affected my behavior or personality in a negative way? I don't know the answer.

We live in a broken society and a broken medical system. There is zero reason that a normal MD should be able to prescribe a generic depression or anxiety medicine without first having a gene-drug interaction test. It should be mandatory. It should be a requirement for any health professional to get their patients tested first. I can only imagine how many lives could have been saved by people having a medication that doesn't interact with their bodies and psyche in a negative way. If you are on any kind of medication and feel, even for a moment, that you are a different version of yourself in even a slightly negative way, then speak up. Listen to yourself and take the warning signs of your body as the truth. You are not going crazy or losing your entire existence! There is a very real possibility that you are having an adverse reaction to the medication. Beyond medication, listen to your body every day. Gut-brain health is so incredibly important. I have had all kidney stones removed, gotten completely off of eggs and casein. I went on a pretty big undertaking of a diet change with the anti-candida diet which I will discuss in another post. All of these things have helped exponentially in helping me to return to a more normal state of existence. There is still the extreme lack of energy and weekly (thank goodness it's not daily) brain fog, but I am getting better. I have great confidence that I will continue to get better. Today looks vastly different than it did 6 months ago. For this, I am very grateful.

xoxo,

Ashley

Be on the lookout for these blog posts in the future:

How to navigate the world of allergens

What is the anti-candida diet?

Celiac, you bitch.